Parent Conversation Guides
Sometimes songs can help you feel what you want to feel
(I am using, “Let It Go” from Frozen in this guide, but I encourage you to work with one of your child’s favorite songs.)
In the movie, Elsa finds the courage to be herself, to be proud of who she really is. She knows that if she tells people more about herself, she might lose some friends. But she finds her courage and decides to do it.
- That’s a feeling we all need to feel, isn’t it? That’s one of the reasons the song was so popular. People wanted to feel that feeling over and over again. They wanted to connect with their courage.
- Tell them about a time that when you were growing up and found a helpful song. Sing it to them – and let yourself get emotional if that happens naturally. Their lives are just as tough as yours was. If you get stuck, you might think about “Once there was a little ole ant …. thought he’d move a rubber tree plant …”
- It’s a good thing if we want to listen to a song many times. It could be our heart is telling us it needs some time to work on something.
- Share some of your favorite songs today. Why do you think you like them so much? Listen together – and again – open up about what you are feeling. Music has such a great way to help hearts come together. What better than to open up and invite your child in.
- When you hear a song on the car radio that makes you feel something – talk about it. Ask if they get the same feelings. Make a habit of treating music as an invitation to talk about feelings.
- Encourage them to go to family members and friends to ask about songs that helped them. Consider staring a diary of those discussions. Consider making a play list and sharing it with all.
The essential and defining characteristic of childhood is not the effortless merging of dream and reality, but only alienation. There are no words for childhood’s dark turns and exhalations. – Stephen King