I started the ‘gender reveal party’ trend. And I regret it.

I was certainly not anticipating creating an entire identity for my child. I was just looking for a way to up the ante and get everyone excited and involved. And I have a flair for theatrics and love to throw parties – we had a party for the goldfish once. We have a blowout for the dog every year. I just kind of invented an occasion out of it. …

Now I think the whole thing is not great at all, though. The problem is they overemphasize one aspect of a person. I had two more kids after Bianca, but I never had another gender reveal party. …

On Christmas morning when she was three, she opened up a set of Legos in primary colors and started crying. She said, “Santa Claus brought me a boy toy.” – she thought because they weren’t pink they weren’t for her. That’s when I was like, “You know what? Something has to change.” There’s such an obsession with gender that it becomes limiting in many ways and exploitative in others. You don’t want what’s between your legs to guide your path in life.

By Jenna Karvunidis, as told to Molly Langmuir, The Guardian